i tend to forget that i started them, i guess that shouldn’t surprise me.. i am pretty good at not finishing things that i’ve set out to do. although, i don’t really know if one can finish a blog. you could probably give it a better shot than i have.
fuck..
I need three things right now.. well, four maybe.
bikes, bros, beers and babes.
the four b’s of a happy patrick. (no where in the four b’s is there anything remotely close to welding auto parts in a factory, that’s wierd).
here is hopefully a semi complete list of movies I have watched since being home.
i heart huckabees
juno
august rush
gone baby gone
sherrybaby
the assassination of jesse james
3:10 to yuma
the dangerous lives of alterboys
candy
stop loss
21
believer
annie hall
fracture
the wind that shakes the barley
into the wild
evan almighty
minnie’s first time
seven years in tibet
gods and generals
danny deckchair
I am reed fish
Lost in Translation
Cash Back
Hallam Foe
one hour photo
proof
mean creak
scotland, pa
there are at least a couple others that I am blanking on, point being a have too much time on my hands.
Tuesday evening, Mikey and I were looking for something to do, while surfing the Craigslist Missed Connections. ( I will not rest until I find a missed connection written about me ). Suddenly in the free section were two free passes to a pre-screening of the MTV Films, newest project Stop Loss. I emailed the poster, two minutes later they called, a half an hour later we had the tickets, and about two hours later we were sitting in the theatre.
The film was well done, I would recommend seeing it. It isn’t perfect, there are somethings that I think could’ve been handled differently. But the film does a good job of making certain parts hard to watch, and asking hard questions about duty and what is right.
The premise is that Ryan Phillipe’s character is supposed to be going home, but he gets stop-lossed back to Iraq. Stop-Lossing is a sort of back door draft where individuals who are supposed to be completing their contractual duty are sent back into combat. His character goes AWOL, and the rest of the movie deals with that.
At one point in the film he says ‘fuck the president, this is bullshit and you know it’. I have to agree. Regardless of mine or your opinion on what the duty or responsibility of a service man or woman is, something happened on the way out of the theatre that sent me reeling.
A gentleman behind us said this, “well thanks for bringing me along, but I’ve got to say, I’d rather laugh then see that shit.”
I wanted to slap this asshole, it was just such a perfect representation of american apathy. We’d rather see the latest Will Ferrel movie, or watch Survivor Season 16 then actually have a fucking clue about what is going on in the world.
baby, don’t you worry so much cause under our clothes we’re wild still and yeah I think I’m breaking up It’s the fall and your hairs getting long you tell me its over your shoulders now, over the phone, and its hard cause I never seen it that long. and I can’t even picture where your living now. so I built these stupid crushes on, all the pretty girls here and i sing songs like, tonight I’m throwing gasoline on an old flame cause in the cold, everything dies, everything dies in the winter everything dies in the winter months. everything dies in the winter. so what, let’s not worry so much. cause under our clothes we’re wild still and yeah, I think i’m breaking up.. with the winter coming on I’m just looking for a hand to warm, mine. with the winter coming on, I’m just looking for a hand to warm.
—moral of the story, I am going to need a girl to spend time with in Cleveland.
Mcdonalds in North Dakota.
me : can I get the number ten
lady : the ‘samwrich’?
me : no, the ten piece nugget meal
lady : oh ok, you betcha.
monday — washington, idaho, montana
tuesday — north dakota, minnesota, wisconsin
tomorrow — illinois, indiana, ohio… home.
I was driving to the bikery ( local seattle bike co-op), and I saw the exit for I-90, and all the sudden I was slammed with this holy shit moment, where I realized tomorrow I am going to take that exit and keep driving until I get to my house.
I have lots of books, some movies and some thinking, sleeping, sight seeing to do. It is going to be an adventure to say the least. I am getting antsy.
updates..
as of thursday I was no longer a student at SPU.
as of this morning I am no longer a resident of SPU.
I am feeling a like a bit of a nomad, and it feels damn good to tell the truth. I am going home, I might get a job, I might ride back out to the west coast on a school bus. I don’t know what my life is going to be like for a while, not even the slightest clue. I am just going to feel it out, and I love that, I love the unknown.
Sold my cold knot, a heavy stone. Sold my red horse for a venture home. To vanish on the bow settling slow.
I think that American Football’s full length could have been written for me, seriously for me personally. Almost every lyric on the album seems to pertain to this situation I’ve put myself in. If only Mike Kinsella had written a part about whether or not to get in a car with a retired Navy officer and drive to the east coast. Basically, right now I feel like my life is a mumblecore movie, except it is super mumblecore, there is no script and I am winging it. I hope this ends well, like meeting a cute girl and playing trumpet naked in the bathtub ends well.
